After over a year of walking through the journey of infertility ‘quietly,’ Nate and I feel led to share our story in hopes of providing connection, fellowship, advice, and prayer for others traveling on such a heartbreaking road.
{start at the beginning here}
Part 2
Nothing . . .
NOTHING can explain the grief, the disappointment, and the hurt of losing a
pregnancy.
There are no words.
Through those dark
days, I clung to God.
Good WILL come of
this. He IS Sovereign. There IS a divine plan. HE WILL use this for His glory.
We WILL see our
baby in heaven one day.
God is good.
Even
the night that I miscarried, he was good . . .
Even though it was
the worst night of my life. . .
even in the darkness. . .
I KNEW that God
orchestrated that night perfectly.
I felt like He said, “I am going to take this from Elizabeth and Nate. . .but she is not going
to go through this alone. She will be surrounded by love.”
And we were.
But we were
heartbroken.
Nate loved me well
during that valley. He is so good at that. . .
Very few people
know about our loss. . .
It is even hard
for Nate and I to talk about it to each other.
But I truly
believe that one of the reasons we go through trials is to encourage and support others who might go
through the same or similar trials after us.
God has put people in my path this past year to pray for and comfort after they too have experienced loss.
He is so faithful.
Nate and I encouraged each other with "we weren't even trying to get pregnant and we did. . . surely we will get pregnant again soon"
{Part 3}
God has put people in my path this past year to pray for and comfort after they too have experienced loss.
He is so faithful.
Nate and I encouraged each other with "we weren't even trying to get pregnant and we did. . . surely we will get pregnant again soon"
{Part 3}
Prayers out to you! I suffered a miscarriage also many years ago, 22 in fact, and you can't explain the emotion that you go through. It was to be our first child also and that, I think, made it even harder as I didn't have anything at home to take my mind off of wanting a baby. Ironically, I have always felt very strongly that it was a girl and my favorite name has always been Elizabeth and that was to be my first daughters name. She is still Elizabeth in my heart and I can't wait to see her in heaven some day :)
ReplyDeleteThe hard thing about miscarriages is that they aren't always seen as something to be grieved over. There isn't a child that is held and lost but it is known more as a medical trauma and procedure. To us moms though, it is a very big loss. I too kept my miscarriage between myself and husband and our families because of the fact people just don't talk about them and I felt bad grieving over it. That has always bothered me. In later years, I was finally able to have my daughter and she carries her lost sisters name as her middle name :)
I agree with Michelle also on the "medical trauma" side. That's why when we miscarried I felt led to share about it on the blog and Facebook. It wasn't easy... and it was pretty humbling... but I got a lot of responses from my posts from others telling me they had experienced the same thing and not shared it with anyone. It's soo hard to go through it alone. E, I'm so glad you are sharing about your journey with others. Community is such a blessing in the midst of pain.
DeleteSweet Elizabeth. Funny that you are writing this out...because after two years of "quietly" going through infertility, I was thinking of doing the same thing. I know your hurt, I've lost a pregnancy too. I know the desires, and they will come to fruition, whether with your own blessing or the selfless gift from another mother. I'm in the trenches with you...and I'm praying for you! Will you do the same for us? Blessings, friend! Katie
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your story! There are so many women who have walked this road before you and so many that will walk it behind you. We lost our sweet first baby in October 2010. It's hard to explain the feeling of losing a child to someone that has not had a miscarriage. We still grieve the loss of our sweet baby and look forward with joy to seeing him/her again in heaven! Will be praying for your family!
ReplyDeleteOh friend! You probably read my blog post about this (maybe? I hate to assume) but we experienced a miscarriage in October, and it was so very painful, both physically and emotionally. I hate that you had to experience that and that you have had to experience infertility since then. It took us awhile to get pregnant with Lilleigh, and I was just beside myself with anxiety and grief. Of course, I think we were just that much more thankful when we got pregnant with her, and now that we are pregnant again (and still pregnant, after the miscarriage in between) with this new little one. God has definitely grown me through those trials, but it is still so hard... I'll add you to my "TTC prayer list". Keep me updated.
ReplyDeletepraying for you as you share your story with such boldness. praying you will be encouraged AND that the Lord uses your story to encourage others.
ReplyDelete